Just a quick correction to my family rant...there are people in my family who this is not directed at. These people who I never really talk to or see that often, it is not about you. In fact, you are probably the nicest people in my family. I got to know some of you before I moved to Japan and really enjoyed the time we spent. Others who I saw alot who are good people as well (hint *they have an apt on the upper east side and another group of you live in fort lee*hint hint*), you are without a doubt my favorite people in the family. Coincidentally you are in the same immediate family. I wish all the people on both sides of my family were like you. The people who it is directed at know who they are...

This is definitely not directed at my parents. No matter what I have done they have in some way supported me. The way they say it, as long as I am happy that's all that matters. They might not like me living here, but atleast they support it because I am successful.

The rest of my family still refers to me as a flake, a screw up, etc. anything you can think of to degrade me...almost all of it comes from my mother's side of the family, not naming names or pointing fingers...but y'all know how you are. Haters...why can't you just be happy that I am happy? Living here is something I want to do, I have struggled mightily to get myself where I am today. I ate nothing but plain rice for weeks at a time last summer...you all have no clue! I am here for the long haul, accept it or not I am still here.

As much as I love NY I could not live there again anytime soon. Tokyo is my home. I doubt that I can even function well in western society anymore to be honest with you...I have worked soo damn hard to assimilate myself into japanese society that NY looked totally different when I went back for xmas...There were times I got scared of being mugged, beat up, etc that I would've walked right through saying hi to the guy I was afraid of back in the day because back then I wasn't afraid. Now I am.

I hate that feeling you get in your gut walking through big american cities because you think something might happen or will happen. I was mugged twice in my time living on my own in Queens...one time I got the shit kicked outta me. Didn't visit the family upstate for a month cuz I didn't want them to know. Other time I beat the shit out the guy with my cell phone, split his eye socket in half...why do you think the display on my phone broke dad?? I was also mugged upstate in Utica once...my family thought I made it up...still have the scar on my head from where I was pistol whipped...

All my life I have been told that all I do is lie and that I am full of shit. Maybe it's the other way around. I am not the bad person you people tried to make me think I was. Again, look at yourselves in the mirror and ask yourself where you were when you were 22...bet I am lightyears ahead of you back then...forget that, I know I am. I remember you all when you were 22...I make more salary in a week then you did in a month...prorated for inflation over the last 10-20 yrs. I know that money isn't everything, but since you all have so much of it and can't seem to spare a single fucking nickel that's the only way I can relate to you.

So to my family, if you read the rant below and take it personally you probably should. If it does not sound like you dthen it probably isn't and you shouldn't be mad at me..if anyone is mad at me there is a link to email me and I will even call you if you want...heaven forbid anyone spends a dime to call me in Japan. I call you all once a week. You can take it up with me in any medium you wish...It isn't going to be a shouting match unless you make it one...You always made it very clear how you felt about me and I never opened my mouth till now...flake my ass.